Bertie’s textbook non-apology apology

I know this is sideshow politics, but I’m surprised that more commentators haven’t picked up on the supremely jesuitical nature of Bertie’s “apology” in the Dáil yesterday. The Irish Times stitched together the following “quote” to headline its transcript of his statement:

To the Irish people [...] I offer my apologies

If you were skimming the newspaper that might lead you to form the impression that a contrite Bertie was issuing a sincere mea culpa. What he actually said, under the heading of “regret and apology” was as follows:

There are few of us who—with the benefit of hindsight—would not change some of our past decisions. No one is infallible or perfect. If I had anticipated in 1993 and 1994 that my decision to accept loans from friends or the gift of monies in Manchester would cause such difficulties and media intrusion for my family and friends and would give rise to distortion of my motives and misrepresentation of my conduct, I would not have accepted a penny.

As I survey the events of the last two weeks, I realise that my judgment in accepting help from good and loyal friends and the gift in Manchester—albeit in the context of personal and family circumstances—was an error. It was a misjudgment although not in breach of any law or code of conduct at the time. It was not illegal or impermissible to have done what I did. But I now regret the choices I made in those difficult and dark times. The bewilderment caused to the public about recent revelations has been deeply upsetting for me and others near and dear to me. To them and to the Irish people, I offer my apologies.

I would paraphrase it thus: “It wasn’t wrong, but if I’d known you were going to give me such hassle about it, I probably wouldn’t have done it. I’d also like to apologise to those who had to listen to you all giving me hassle about it.”

Bertie has to be congratulated for working the term “I offer my apologies” into a statement which contains no admission of fault whatsoever. The most he’s willing to admit to is being the unwitting cause of a certain amount of bewilderment. I expect this passage will make its way into the textbooks in due course.

Michael McDowell and the PDs decided to accept this non-apology apology, by means of casuistical formula whereby Bertie’s service to the state bought him a certain amount of credit for questionable dealings. Ivor Callely, being worse than useless, had no such credit to cash in. McDowell, of course, is Ireland’s Most Intelligent Politician™, so he can’t have failed to notice that Bertie didn’t apologise. Instead, he has appealed directly to the media, and through them to the public, “do we really want to scrap a perfectly good Taoiseach just because it’s been slightly dented?”

The matter is closed for now, it seems, but if Bertie’s reputation as an honest and ordinary Joe has taken a bit of a hit, his reputation as the most skilful, the most cunning, the most devious of them all has been considerably enhanced.